The Forbidden Passion of a Governess – Extended Epilogue

A gentle snow fell upon Glastonbrook. Outside the parlor window, Emilia could see the countryside blanketed in white. By the fire, young Henry played with his favorite toy, and in her arms, her newest babe sat, who had been named Cassandra, in memory of Emilia’s late mother. The Christmas tree was shining in the corner and tea was nearly being served. All in all, Emilia felt utterly content, and overwhelmed.

So much had happened in those happy years since she and Lord Joshua were wed, Emilia gave birth to her first child, and the second babe was then got. Not only had Deirdre come out into society, she had also become belle of the ball, as the saying goes. It nearly drove the earl mad, having to meet with so many eligible men that vied for Deirdre’s hand. They were all of similar pedigree, and most of them were handsome, yet still, the earl thought none of them were suitable. Each seemed more cocky and arrogant than the last, and it had sent Deirdre into hysterics.

“It’s an important evening,” Emilia said, holding Cassandra in her arms and looking over to where the earl stood by the window.

“Just as important as all the rest of them,” he huffed.

Emilia knew that it was still within the earl’s nature to be haughty, but it was only because he cared so deeply. He would be loathe to see his sister marry someone who would make her unhappy in time. He only wanted for her happiness, and it filled him with frustration whenever he came across a gentleman that ardently wanted her hand and yet was unpleasing in character.

“I hear good things of the future duke,” Emilia went on, wishing to placate the earl.

“I’ll believe it when I see it with my own eyes,” the earl replied, softening.

Much had changed in the dynamic of their relationship since the start. Although the earl could still be testy at times, controlling and demanding, being in love had done something different to his temperament. He was no longer icy on the outside. In fact, Lord Joshua was far more agreeable than anyone had ever seen him; yet still, sometimes his old ways shown through.

Emilia had an immense soothing effect upon him, and it took some time for her to learn. She could tell at night when the earl came to bed surly or overtaxed. Emilia had learned the right way to gently place her hand upon his shoulder or chest, and could feel him relax immediately. And for her part, as well, when Emilia became overwhelmed by the children or the business of motherhood, the earl would provide all the emotional and financial support that she needed in order to brave the storm.

But, the tempests always passed quickly because Emilia loved being a mother, despite the fact that the earl wanted as many children as possible. She feared that after having two, or even three, the fire between she and the earl would temper, but it was not so. The passion and communion of their love making had never tarnished, and only seemed to become more inflamed as they became closer, and their love traveled deeper.

Yet still, the marriage of Deirdre was the most stressful occurrence at Glastonbrook in some time. It brought a frown to Winnifred’s face, which was rare, and it even made Miles occasionally ill-tempered, which was even more rare. But no one liked to see anxiety and fear taint the good spirits of Glastonbrook, and especially around Christmastime.

But the simple fact of the matter was that Deirdre needed to be wed that very season. She would not be taken into town, for the earl insisted that she wed someone in or near to Castle Comb. And he didn’t like the ton and all their ostentatious dealings. He wanted a simple, respectable, educated, wealthy man for his sister. He would settle for no less.

Despite the impasse, Emilia chose to focus on other things. For instance, the smell of fresh pine needles filled her nostrils, gorgeous poinsettias dotted every room, and lit candles were placed in every window. It was a majestic winter, that much was certain, and Emilia was intent upon making the most of it. And even more so, she had a good feeling about the future Duke of Stockbridge.

Lord Nicholas Enni was not the bombastic type, like many other wealthy folks in town or the country. There was a quiet, simple grace about him that was well respected. And because he oft kept to his studies, and learning about his future duties as the Duke of Stockbridge, it was not often that Lord Nicholas was found at parties. Certainly, even the earl had heard very little about the chap, but Emilia knew all that she needed to.

Lord Nicholas was a rather tall fellow, with golden blonde hair and vivid green eyes. He took a liking to books, and studied law at Oxford. He had his father’s, the current Duke of Stockbridge, serious nature and keen intellect. He was also a man of letters, having studied literature and philosophy.

At first, Emilia had to wonder why Lord Nicholas took such a keen interest in Deirdre. Despite her love for her, Emilia had to admit that the earl’s sister was feisty, vivacious, and hungry for life and adventure. Considering Lord Nicholas’ somber temperament, she wondered why there was a connection. That evening at dinner she would soon find out.

“Is he here yet?” Deirdre asked, poking her head into the door. Emilia turned to watch her husband bristle.

“I’m sure he’ll be here shortly,” Emilia said.

“Come and summon me in my room,” Deirdre said, making a hasty exit, “I wish to come down the stairs to greet him.”

“She is to put more cosmetics on her face,” the earl protested.

“Nonsense,” Emilia replied, looking down at Cassandra in her arms and smiling. She had the earl’s green eyes. “She is more beautiful than ever, and it makes you uneasy.”

“So she’s not wearing cosmetics?” the earl asked.

“No, that is her natural beauty shining through.”

Emilia had to admit that Deirdre was alarmingly beautiful. It was the kind of beauty that would give a father night sweats, and so it was having a similar effect upon the earl, who was entrusted with her care.

“You’ll see that once she’s wed, you’ll be far more at ease,” Emilia went on.

“That is . . . if it’s the right man.”

“It will be,” Emilia replied with assurance.

“Papa, play with me!” Henry cried, rushing over to his father on his wobbly legs.

“If you insist, little bear,” the earl said, his demeanor suddenly changing.

For all the issues with the earl’s temperament, he was a shining example of a father. He took so much time to enjoy his children, and was an excellent, strong role model for them. It filled Emilia with unspeakable joy to witness it. In fact, fatherhood, as well as marriage, had changed the earl in considerable ways. He was an upstanding man in all respects, and the weightiness of his duty left a bit of salt and pepper around his temples. Instead of being put off by watching her husband gently age, Emilia was entranced by it. When he smiled, the tiny lines at the corners of her eyes filled her with even more longing. His handsomeness was only redoubled.

“Dinner is ready,” Winnifred said, stepping into the parlor. “Has the gentleman arrived?”

“He is not here yet,” Emilia replied, “but I suspect that he shall be here any moment.”

“It’s best for him to show up on time,” Winnifred said with a huff. “We don’t want the food to get cold.”

Winnifred abruptly left the room and Emilia smiled to herself. Similar to the earl, Winnifred was anxious to see Deirdre married to the proper man. She cared for the girl as if she were her own flesh and blood.

“He has arrived,” Miles said, passing through the parlor and down the hall.

Emilia composed herself and remained in her sight, whilst the earl came to attention like a fox that has just heard the horn, signifying the hunt.

“Remain calm,” Emilia instructed her husband.

“Call the nanny to take the children,” the earl commanded.

“You’ll need to summon her, my love,” Emilia replied. “I’m indisposed at the moment,” she added, looking down at her precious, pink-cheeked girl, fast asleep in her arms.

“Very well,” the earl said, leaving the room to locate Rebecca, the young girl that had been hired to look after the little ones.

“Lord Nicholas Enni,” Miles announced, coming into the parlor then standing aside so the young man could enter.

Emilia remained seated, still not wishing to wake Cassandra till Rebecca arrived.

“How do you do?” Emilia said softly.

“Good evening, M’am,” Lord Nicholas said, doffing his hat and bowing his head. He looked down at Cassandra and smiled. “Is that your little one?”

“It is,” Emilia said lovingly. “I fear that it’s her bedtime.”

Just then, Rebecca entered, followed by the earl. Emilia watched as the earl stood tall, holding back his shoulders and puffing out his chest. She marveled at the behavior of territorial men.

“Good evening, M’Lord,” Lord Nicholas said with a bow of the head.

“Good evening,” the earl replied curtly.

Rebecca took Cassandra from Emilia’s arms with expert care, being sure not to wake her, then she walked over to where Henry stood, and took him by his little palm, walking him out of the room and to the nursery on the second floor.

“We’re so glad to have you with us, M’Lord,” Emilia said, finally standing. It seemed odd to call someone so young a lord, but it was the custom when one was in line to inherit a dukedom.

“The pleasure is all mine, I assure you,” Lord Nicholas replied with a warm smile.

What struck Emilia first was the tremendous handsomeness and grace of their guest. There was an angelic quality to him, and although he looked quite young, there was an adult seriousness to his demeanor. Lord Nicholas Enni seemed like the type that could beguile, if only from his innate dignity.

Deirdre was summoned and came down the stairs with a flourish, but even though the girl took great pains to perfect herself before seeing Lord Nicholas, Emilia saw how Deirdre softened once in his presence. No longer did she care for her appearance, but rather, seemed transfixed by the gentleman caller that had come to Glastonbrook.

“You look lovely, Lady Deirdre,” Lord Nicholas said, his eyes sparkling even more when he beheld her.

“I thank you. So good to have you pay a call,” Deirdre replied.

Emilia got goosebumps immediately. She knew that the match was right, in the marrow of her bones, but looking over at her husband, she saw him scowling. If Lord Joshua was going to be the only impediment to that young love, then it may be a battle of wills, indeed.

Entering the dining room, Emilia was not displeased with the hard work the staff had put into the decorations. It filled her heart with the Christmas spirit, as did the aroma of mulled cider, freshly baked rhubarb pie, and the main dish; a fragrant white fish baked in white wine and herbs. All was to be accompanied by Winnifred’s famous stuffing, and topped with a rich cranberry compote.

“Lady Deirdre,” Lord Nicholas said, pulling out her chair for her.

“I thank you,” Deirdre replied, visibly blushing.

The young lovers were seated across from one another, for the earl would not dare to have them sit side by side. The earl sat at the head of the table, as always, and Emilia was placed to his left. It was an intimate affair, but just the climate necessary for Emilia and the earl to draw out Lord Nicholas’ true character.

“Do you care for the hunt?” the earl asked, just as the soup course was being served.

“I’m fond of the hunt, yes,” Lord Nicholas replied.

Emilia had to prevent herself from rolling her eyes. The earl was playing the role of the dutiful patriarch, of course. She should expect no less. But she did wish that he might let his guard down ever so slightly for the kind suitor.

“I find that there is much to learn from the hunt,” Lord Nicholas went on, unafraid. “There are many qualities that it teaches. And I also find that the fresh air and exercise are good for the constitution.”

“Indeed,” the earl replied, seemingly impressed by the boy’s answer by trying not to show it.

Emilia posited that it couldn’t be easy for her husband; sitting across from the boy who wished to marry his sister, someone who would eventually have a higher standing in society than he currently enjoyed.

“Have you sisters?” the earl asked, picking up his spoon and taking a gentlemanly sip of his tomato soup with cream.

“I have no sisters. I’m the sole heir to the Stockbridge name,” Lord Nicholas went on.

The earl did not seem pleased with that response. To Emilia’s understanding, it was because he felt that if Lord Nicholas did have sisters, then it would be easier for him to understand the predicament that the earl was in. What’s more, he would also have knowledge of what it was like to live with vivacious ladies under his roof.

“And have you a head for business?” the earl went on.

Deirdre looked positively mortified at that point, watching as her brother laid into the man that she wished to marry.

“I would say that my business skills are strong, but it is the practice of law that I understand best. I studied it at Oxford,” Lord Nicholas explained, still not touching his soup.

Emilia frowned to herself. The boy must be made uncomfortable by all the earl’s questioning. It pained her to watch. She only wished that her guests would be at ease when at table.

“Why don’t we talk of other matters?” Emilia finally said, hoping to be of assistance. Deirdre looked visibly relieved by suggestion.

“Such delightful soup,” Deirdre said, endeavoring to change the topic immediately.

“Some of the best tomato soup I have ever had,” Lord Nicholas said with a pleasant smile. “I grew up eating a great deal of it, and the flavor reminds me of my child. But God help my beloved childhood cook, I’d say that this tastes much better than what I grew up on.”

“Winnifred would be pleased. This is one of her favorite soups to make.” Emilia was beginning to feel relief as she watched the young man relax.

“You can tell from the flavor,” Lord Nicholas went on. “It’s possible to taste the care that went into the dish.”

To Emilia’s consternation, the earl seemed still to be displeased with what was taking place at dinner. It was not a surprise, considering to what high standing he held his sister, yet still it was troubling. She wished to help Lord Nicholas, but there was only so much that she could do.

“I believe that you mentioned once,” Deirdre went on, hoping to continue the good cheer, “that you were quite fond of fine art.”

“That is very much the truth, Lady Deirdre,” Lord Nicholas went on, smiling at her warmly from across the table. “Although my mind was preoccupied with law in school, my heart was set on the great painters. I studied them religiously, and even had the chance to visit some of the best museums abroad. In fact, it is my greatest hope to do much more traveling soon. I have a whole list of great paintings and works of sculpture that I’m determined to behold with my own eyes.”

Emilia smiled brightly, encouraged by the gentleman’s interest in the finer things in life. Deirdre as well was beaming. Yet still, the earl was stone-like. And in fact, his demeanor did not improve throughout the rest of the meal.

It was strange, considering that the repast was some of the best that Emilia had ever tasted. It was almost as though through her culinary magic Winnifred was spurring the young man on, giving him encouragement and approval, but it would not be enough.

Later, when the meal was complete and all were pleasantly satisfied, the ladies were excused so that the earl and Lord Nicholas might retire to the study for brandy and cigars. Although it pained Emilia to leave the men alone, she knew that she had no choice. Men needed to be men, after all.

*******

“So you wish to travel?” the earl said, lighting his cigar and sizing up the young gentleman yet again.

“It is my greatest wish, yes.”

“And if you are to take Lady Deirdre under your care, what is to become of her during that time that you’re gallivanting around the world?”

“I wish to bring her with me,” Lord Nicholas replied hopefully.

“Is that so?” the earl asked, sipping his brandy. “And you think that that kind of journey is safe for a girl of her tender age?”

“I think that it could be quite good for her. Seeing the world shall help to expand her mind. There is so much to learn when one steps out of Britain. Life is meant for exploration,” Lord Nicholas said, taking a puff off his cigar and trying to conceal the coughing that ensued.

Although the earl was impressed by the boy’s intrepid spirit, there was an immediate decision that was made in the study on that evening. It was not pertaining to Lord Nicholas’ character; for the earl found him to be an intriguing gentleman. But it was not his duty to marry his sister off to an intriguing gentleman but rather a grounded man, with two feet firmly planted in the ground. In the earl’s estimation, Lord Nicholas Enni was not that man.

In the day that followed, what should have been joyous turned into catastrophe. The earl took pains to inform Deirdre the very next morning about his decision, and in response, she ran from the breakfast table without uttering a word. Only later, after the girl had had some time to collect herself, did Emilia come up to her room in order to console her.

“Are you all right?” Emilia asked, poking her head in the door.

“Oh, Emilia. My heart is breaking,” Deirdre replied, still wiping away tears.

“Come, come now,” Emilia said, approaching Deirdre and embracing her as she sat looking out the window.

“I don’t understand,” Deirdre said, burying her head in Emilia’s chest. “He’s such a brute.”

“I promise you that he does not wish to be so. Your brother only wants what is best for you.”

“But he doesn’t know my heart!’ Emilia protested. “If he could only see Lord Nicholas through my eyes. Then he would know of my love, and how strong it truly is.”

“I know, sweet girl,” Emilia replied, petting Deirdre’s head.

“We met at the Christmas fair, several weeks ago,” Deirdre explained, looking out the window dreamily. “Rebecca was my chaperone. We were never alone. But when I first saw him, I knew that I was in love.”

Emilia smiled to herself. It was so charming to see young love in full bloom.

“We kept glancing at one another the whole time. And finally, Lord Nicholas picked a fine piece of green tinsel and presented it to me. I received it, and blushed so profusely that I was sure he’d never wish to speak to me again.”

“I’m sure he was flattered,” Emilia said with a smile.

“He must have been, for then he began to send me a profusion of letters, the contents of which were so tender and sweet.”

“Everything will happen as it should in the end. Have faith,” Emilia instructed, and continued to hold the girl for some time in silence.

In truth, Emilia felt like she deserved more say in the matter. Deirdre was a daughter to her, of sorts, and the earl shouldn’t be the only one who had a say in her future.

Finally leaving the room, Emilia was determined to confront her husband that very moment. He was not in the study, as was customary for that time of day, but rather in the library, pursuing books. The room was decorated to such immaculate perfection that it gave Emilia pause when she first entered. Yes, the holiday spirit was alive and well in Glastonbrook. If only Deirdre could partake in the holiday cheer. But alas, her heart was broken.

“M’Lord,” Emilia said, exciting her husband’s attention.

“My love,” the earl said softly, replacing a book to the shelf.

“My I have a word with you?”

“As many as you’d like,” he replied.

“It pertains to Lady Deirdre,” Emilia began.

The earl, visibly disappointed and wishing that it was another topic, turned from his wife.

“You can’t escape what I have to say, Joshua,” Emilia said. It had become natural in their conversations that Emilia should call him by his given name when they were talking of serious matters that banished decorum.

“Wife, what is done is done,” the earl said, still not looking at her.

“Nothing is done, Joshua. There is still time. Your sister is madly in love.”

“Love does not make for a sound marriage.”

Emilia was in utter shock and speechless. Their marriage was based upon love and nothing else. In fact, should they have followed the rules of society they should never have married at all.

Through her silence, the earl sensed what his wife was thinking, and his demeanor quickly shifted.

“We are different, my love,” he said, turning and gently placing his hands upon her shoulders.

“We are not different, husband. We are happy because we married for love. If you do not grant your sister the same privilege then I shall lose all faith in you,” Emilia said gravely.

“Wife,” the earl pled, still holding her shoulders and leaning in for a kiss. Emilia rebuffed him.

“No,” she said, pulling away. “When you asked for my hand in marriage, you showed me that you are a man that believes in love. If you do not allow your sister to marry the man that calls out to her heart, then my trust could very well be ruined.”

“Emilia, please,” the earl begged.

“I’ll allow you to think about that,” Emilia said, gently removing her husband’s hands from her shoulders and exiting the room.

It pained her to do it, but the situation was dire. Deirdre’s heart, and her future, were on the line, and so therefore Emilia chose to make her point clear. However much she longed for the earl’s touches, and his kisses, she would forgo them until the matter was settled.

An old tempest came over Glastonbrook as the feud continued. The servants would scurry through the house, some of them joyful and singing carols, but that was not enough to allay the tension. The Christmas tree, shining bright in the parlor, was not luminescent enough to quell the torrent. In the days that followed, a horrible blizzard erupted outside Glastonbrook’s doors, keeping the residents penned inside. Winnifred served hot cocoa and cider, but these beverages were not sweet enough to temper the earl’s sour mood.

On several occasions, the earl tried to speak to Emilia in private, wishing to end the conflict and bring her back into his arms; whilst still winning the battle, of course. But Emilia could see through her husband at that point and would have none of it. Deirdre would marry Lord Nicholas Enni, and until the earl agreed to it, he would not share her kisses, nor her bed.

When Christmas morning finally came upon them, the blizzard outside would not cease. The wind hissed and cried, and whenever so much as a door at Glastonbrook was opened a pelting of snow would rush into the warm home, dousing any who were so unlucky to stand in its way. For that very reason, the morning was cozy; the denizens remained bundled, and a warm fire was lit in the parlor, where presents were to be opened.

As was tradition at Glastonbrook, on Christmas morning breakfast was not taken in the dining room but whilst sitting around the presents. The servants were welcome to attend, and a general air of jubilation was enjoyed by all. Winnifred cooked her very best blueberry scones, accompanied by fresh butter, clotted cream, and an assortment of jams. Eggs were also served, along with ample portions of ham, roast tomatoes, baked mushrooms, and blood sausage.

As Emilia sipped upon a warm glass of eggnog, watching Deirdre sit sadly by the fire, she sighed to herself. Cassandra was nearby in Rebecca’s arms, and young Henry played with his father off near the window. All were laughing and smiling, including Winnifred herself who had doffed her apron in favor of a festive green muslin gown. Miles put away his ledger and his quill pen in favor of a warm cup of cider, and the rest of the servants flitted about with little plates in their hands. Emilia’s heart was filled with joy; except for that one little conflict that kept Deidre from being happy, and prevented Emilia from coming as close to her husband as she wished.

Should she banish the conflict altogether and give in? Should Emilia raise a white flag and put an end to it all? Her husband did have the last word, after all. But considering how much Emilia had done to restore life to Glastonbrook, she had to believe that she still had her finger on the pulse of what was right. No, no, Emilia would not relent.

“My love,” the earl said, approaching Emilia with a small gift wrapped in silver paper.

“Shall I open it now?” Emilia asked, never being the one to open a gift first.

“Yes,” the earl said humbly, kneeling before his wife for all the room to see.

Opening the paper gently, not wishing to ruin the beautiful wrapping that she was sure was done with Winnifred’s hands, Emilia found a charming black box within with a hinged lid. She pushed the lid up, revealing a satin interior and a lavish diamond necklace that took her breath away.

“Joshua,” Emilia said, thinking the gift was too much.

“Put it on,” he said tenderly, no doubt tossing in the conflict aside in order to enjoy the happiness and awe written on his wife’s face.

“This is too much.”

“Put it on,” he said again. “Allow me to help.”

Emilia took the necklace, weighty with metal and rich diamonds, and wrapped it around her neck. The adornment felt cool upon her neck, and hung perfectly upon her dainty collarbones.

“I have no words,” Emilia said, placing her hand upon it.

“It’s almost as beautiful as you are, my love,” the earl said, bringing a hand to her cheek.

“Let me see, Mum!” Henry cried, rushing to his mother. He jumped into her lap and she held him tight, so that he could feel the prismatic diamonds with his own tiny fingers. “Papa did a good job.”

“Yes, papa did a good job, indeed,” Emilia replied, looking up at her husband expectantly.

“Embrace me, wife,” the earl said, hungry to have her close.

Emilia put Henry down gently and stood, allowing the earl’s arms to encircle her. She sighed deeply, having so missed his warm, strong arms. Perhaps, in the name of the Christmas spirit, she would let go of the fight. Maybe, it was all for the best.

Yet, quite unexpectedly, fate would intervene in the form of a knock on the door.

“What the devil?” Miles said under his breath, wondering if it was just the wind.

“Go see who it is,” the earl said, not wishing to let go of his wife.

“Very well,” Miles replied with a bow of the head.

As the door was opened, and the wind whipped and whistled down the hall, a snow-covered figure entered and was led to the parlor, where all eyes stood in disbelief.

“Happy Christmas,” Lord Nicholas Enni said, removing his hat. The young man was blue and shivering.

“Lord Nicholas,” Emilia replied in shock, wiggling out of her husband’s arms. “You’re freezing to the bone.”

“The weather isn’t so bad,” Lord Nicholas replied, his teeth chattering.

“Come here by the fire,” Winnifred said, taking the man by the shoulders. “I’ll get you a warm cider.”

“That would be most kind,” Lord Nicholas replied. Despite the cold, his green eyes were sparkling, and they twinkled even more brilliantly at the sight of Lady Deirdre.

“Lord Nicholas,” Deirdre said breathlessly.

“Lady Deirdre. Happy Christmas,” Lord Nicholas said, visibly emotional at the sight of her.

“What brings you here?” Deirdre asked.

“There is something important that I want to give you,” Lord Nicholas replied.

Emilia looked to the earl, unsure of what to make of the situation. He gave her a knowing smile, and placed a warm hand upon the small of her back.

“Lady Deirdre,” Lord Nicholas said, getting down on one knee. “I wish to give you this ring,” he said, presenting a small box that was opened in much the same way as Emilia’s gift was.

“Heavens,” Deirdre said, bringing her hands up to her cheeks. She looked to her brother for reassurance, and the earl merely nodded his head, complying.

“The ring is yours, whether you wish to be my wife or no,” Lord Nicholas went on. “But should you choose to have me, it might be the happiest Christmas I have ever known.”

“Yes, yes, yes, and yes!” Deirdre replied, tears falling from her eyes. Lord Nicholas got up from his knee and took Deirdre in his arms, lifting her off the ground.

“Joshua,” Emilia whispered to the earl in disbelief. “Is this your doing?” she asked.

“I made the arrangements. Not only is Deirdre’s happiness important, but I wish to please my wife in all things,” the earl said with a smile.

“And so you have,” Emilia said, throwing herself into his arms. “So you have.”

It was one of the happiest Christmases that Glastonbrook had ever known, and there would be many more to come. Deirdre would marry, and bear happy children. And Emilia herself would continue to populate the family of Lord Joshua Forest.

And throughout their prosperous days, Emilia would always stop to wonder how the joy of Glastonbrook had been stolen, but then remarkably restored. In fact, the home and all its denizens enjoyed a life of contentment that was never known under that roof before.

THE END

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